by Christine Fonseca
Copyright (c) 2010.
I picked up this book in an attempt to dive deeper into the psychological concept of emotional intensity. I’m an intense guy myself; I live in an intense workplace full of gifted people; my boss is intense; I have an intense wife and daughter at home. I’m trying to learn how to keep all these intense people (including myself) from boiling over. I could not find any management books on the concept of emotional intensity, so educational books served as an adequate substitute.
The first thing Fonseca taught me in this book is that intensity is not the enemy. It is not perfect, but neither is it wrong. It’s just a dynamic in the situation. This fact makes me feel better because many times, people can make intensity out as evil. It is not. Rather, it is the means by which many gifted people live. Gifted people see reality more deeply than most; this perception is a great aid in life, but it is not perfect. It must be managed.
The second thing Fonseca taught me was that some people, including myself and some close to me at work and at home, are “dually exceptional.” This means that besides being gifted, the person has another dynamic at play like a learning disability or a mental illness (e.g., autism or bipolar). This makes the picture way more complicated. In fact, with these people, rarely do first instincts prove to be reliable because the dynamics are much more complicated. These realities make my life much more entertaining.
I enjoyed this quick read. I read the entire book in about 24 hours. It’s good for parents and for teachers – as well as colleagues and people who engage in self-therapy. It makes the whole complicated mess just a little more simple – and more bearable.